"I have two blogs, but don't get too excited. Ladies."

Hey folks, there's a new 'fake' article on my other blog.

I've already been told it isn't funny at all.

Peace out y'all.

Night of the Living Owls

This was kind of an odd day. Not one of those days where someone dies or something, just a tad out of the ordinary.

For one thing, I had my taxes done. Boring, yes, but this was the first time I've not done them myself, so I felt a little nervous about it.

Late in the evening, I was feeling particularly depressed and lonely, yet indecisive. I eventually decided to go out by myself and people-watch at Mo's Irish Pub in Tosa (there are not any bars in Washington County that I would feel comfortable going to by myself. They're just not inviting places). As I'm leaving my driveway, I see two small yellow eyes reflect back at me from across the street. There was a tiny owl sitting on the road, just 2 inches away from the white border line on our busy state highway.

I was kind of flabbergasted. I have seen all sorts of crazy wildlife here in the country, including regular visits from wild turkeys. I had never seen a baby owl before. I beeped my horn and made noises, and walked right up to it, but the owl did nothing but look at me. It was about the cutest damn thing I've ever seen, and I hate puppies. Well, I hate forwarded email pictures of puppies - insipid!

So I went back in the house, thinking it was injured or something, and found a box I could put it in until tomorrow. I figured it might be feeling better by then, or else it could be brought to the Humane Society.

Flashlight in hand, I put on some leather gloves and walked out onto the highway. Standing right in front of the owl, I put the flashlight between my knees and reached down to cup the bird in my hands. It was pretty small, maybe a little smaller than a pigeon, so I felt confident I could pick it up without hurting it or engaging in a struggle. Literally, as I just got my hands around it, it flew off.

Anti-climactic, I know, but it was very odd that it didn't fly off until I was actually trying to hold it. It was also odd that it was right across from my driveway, where there aren't any overhanging trees or anything. I hope it will be alright; it flew into the night, hopefully to its rightful Owl-Master.

Then I went to Mo's, had two pints of Guiness, and got hit on by a middle-age woman trying to get a date for her similarly-aged sister. I'm 28. The sister was not amused and I walked away after being put through a brief interrogation (older women really get right to the point, it seems).

Then, I went home and wrote this.

Alone.

Part of me wishes that owl wouldn't have flown away.

UPDATE: The photo up top is what the owl looked like, and is my best guess based on those that live in Wisconsin - a Northern Saw-whet owl. It could have been a Screech Owl, but what I saw didn't have 'tufts' like all the guidebooks describe it. So it wasn't a baby owl, it was just a small species.

(photo of Northern Saw-whet Owl taken from The Owl Pages)